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 š™½šš˜ššššŽšš‹šš˜šš˜šš”



š™øšš ššœšššš’šš•šš• šš‘ššžšš›ššššœ šš’šš— šššš‘ššŽ šš‘ššŽššŠšš•šš’šš—šš, šš–ššŠšš¢šš‹ššŽ ššŽššŸššŽšš— šš–šš˜šš›ššŽ. š™»ššŽšššššš’šš—šš šššš˜, š™ø'šš– šš“ššžššœšš šš—šš˜šš šššš˜šš˜šš ššŠšš šš’šš. š™ø šššš›šš¢ šš–šš¢ šš‹ššŽššœšš šššš˜ šššš’ššŸššŽ ššŽššŸššŽšš›šš¢šššš‘šš’šš—šš ššŠ šš™šš•ššŠššŒššŽ šš‹ššžšš šš’šš šš‘šš˜ššžšš—ššššœ šš–ššŽ šš–šš˜šš›ššŽ šššš‘ššŠšš— ššŽššŸššŽšš›. š™øšš šš”ššŽššŽšš™ššœ šš‘šš˜šš•šššš’šš—šš šš–ššŽ ššŠšš šššš‘ššŽ ššœššŠšš–ššŽ šš™šš•ššŠššŒššŽ. š™°šš•šš• šššš‘ššŽ šš–ššŽšš–šš˜šš›šš’ššŽššœ, ššŠšš•šš• šššš‘ššŽ ššœšš˜šš—ššššœ, ššŠšš•šš• šššš‘ššŽ šš™šš•ššŠššŒššŽššœ... š™øšš ššŠšš•šš• šš”ššŽššŽšš™ššœ ššŒšš˜šš–šš’šš—šš šš‹ššŠššŒšš”. š™ø ššŒššŠšš—'šš ššŒšš˜šš—šššš›šš˜šš• šš’šš šš˜šš› šš‘šš˜šš  š™ø ššššŽššŽšš•. š™“ššŸššŽšš— šš’šš š™ø šš ššŠšš—ššššŽšš, š™ø ššŒšš˜ššžšš•šššš—'šš. š™ø'šš– šš—šš˜šš šš›ššŽššŠšššš¢ šššš˜ šš•ššŽšš šš’šš ššŠšš•šš• šššš˜ ššŠšš—šš šš–šš˜ššœšš šš˜šš ššŠšš•šš•, šššš˜ šš•ššŽšš ššŽššŸššŽšš›šš¢šššš‘šš’šš—šš šššš˜ šššš‘ššŠšš š™ø šš ššŠšš—šš šššš˜ šš‘šš˜šš•šš šššš˜šš›ššŽššŸššŽšš›. š™° šš™ššŠšš›šš šš˜šš šš–ššŽ šš”ššŽššŽšš™ššœ šš•šš’ššŸšš’šš—šš šš’šš— šššš‘ššŽ šš™ššŠššœšš...

š™»šš˜ššŸššŽ,

š™»ššžšš—ššŠ-š™±šš›šš’šš  


š™š™š™žš™£š™œš™Ø š™¬š™šš™£š™© š™™š™žš™›š™›š™šš™§š™šš™£š™© š™–š™Ø š™„ š™©š™š™¤š™Ŗš™œš™š™© š™©š™š™šš™® š™¬š™¤š™Ŗš™”š™™. š™„ š™”š™¤š™Øš™© š™¢š™®š™Øš™šš™”š™› š™›š™¤š™§ š™– š™˜š™¤š™Ŗš™„š™”š™š š™¤š™› š™©š™žš™¢š™šš™Ø. š™„ š™”š™¤š™Øš™© š™©š™š™š š™¤š™£š™šš™Ø š™©š™š™–š™© š™„ š™”š™¤š™«š™šš™™ š™©š™š™š š™¢š™¤š™Øš™©. š™„ š™”š™¤š™Øš™© š™¢š™®š™Øš™šš™”š™› š™žš™£ š™”š™¤š™«š™žš™£š™œ š™®š™¤š™Ŗ. š™Žš™¤š™¢š™š š™©š™š™žš™£š™œš™Ø š™—š™§š™¤š™ š™š š™Øš™¤š™¢š™šš™©š™š™žš™£š™œ š™žš™£š™Øš™žš™™š™š š™¤š™› š™¢š™š, š™©š™š™žš™£š™œš™Ø š™©š™š™–š™© š™–š™§š™š š™Øš™©š™žš™”š™” š™š™šš™–š™”š™žš™£š™œ š™–š™›š™©š™šš™§ š™–š™”š™” š™©š™š™šš™Øš™š š™©š™žš™¢š™š. š™„ š™™š™¤š™£'š™© š™§š™šš™œš™§š™šš™© š™”š™¤š™«š™žš™£š™œ š™©š™š™š š™„š™šš™§š™Øš™¤š™£š™Ø š™©š™š™–š™© š™„ š™”š™¤š™«š™šš™™ š™–š™£š™™ š™Øš™©š™žš™”š™” š™”š™¤š™«š™š š™žš™› š™„'š™¢ š™©š™§š™Ŗš™”š™® š™š™¤š™£š™šš™Øš™©. š™„ š™™š™¤š™£'š™© š™§š™šš™œš™§š™šš™© š™žš™© š™—š™šš™˜š™–š™Ŗš™Øš™š š™žš™© š™¬š™–š™Ø š™©š™š™š š™¢š™¤š™Øš™© š™¬š™¤š™£š™™š™šš™§š™›š™Ŗš™” š™©š™žš™¢š™š š™¤š™› š™¢š™® š™”š™žš™›š™š. š™š™š™–š™©'š™Ø š™¬š™š™® š™žš™© š™Øš™©š™žš™”š™” š™š™Ŗš™§š™©š™Ø. š™„ š™£š™šš™«š™šš™§ š™”š™¤š™«š™šš™™ š™©š™š™–š™© š™¢š™Ŗš™˜š™ š™”š™žš™ š™š š™©š™š™šš™£. š™„ š™£š™šš™«š™šš™§ š™”š™¤š™«š™šš™™ š™Øš™¤š™¢š™šš™¤š™£š™š š™”š™žš™ š™š š™©š™š™–š™© š™–š™£š™™ š™„ š™©š™š™žš™£š™  š™„ š™£š™šš™«š™šš™§ š™¬š™žš™”š™”. š˜¼ š™„š™–š™§š™© š™¤š™› š™¢š™š š™¬š™žš™”š™” š™–š™”š™¬š™–š™®š™Ø š™”š™¤š™«š™š š™®š™¤š™Ŗ. š˜¼š™”š™¬š™–š™®š™Ø. š™„ š™Ÿš™Ŗš™Øš™© š™£š™šš™šš™™ š™©š™¤ š™”š™šš™–š™§š™£ š™”š™žš™«š™žš™£š™œ š™¢š™® š™”š™žš™›š™š š™¬š™žš™©š™š™¤š™Ŗš™© š™®š™¤š™Ŗ. š™”š™¤š™Ŗ'š™”š™” š™–š™”š™¬š™–š™®š™Ø š™š™–š™«š™š š™– š™„š™”š™–š™˜š™š š™žš™£ š™¢š™® š™¢š™žš™£š™™ š™–š™£š™™ š™žš™£ š™¢š™® š™š™šš™–š™§š™©. š™„ š™¬š™žš™Øš™ š™„ š™˜š™¤š™Ŗš™”š™™ š™§š™šš™”š™žš™«š™š š™¤š™Ŗš™§ š™¢š™¤š™¢š™šš™£š™©š™Ø, š™„ š™¬š™–š™£š™© š™©š™š™–š™© š™«š™šš™§š™Øš™žš™¤š™£ š™¤š™› š™¢š™®š™Øš™šš™”š™› š™—š™–š™˜š™  š™¬š™š™šš™£ š™„ š™¬š™–š™Ø š™¬š™žš™©š™ š™®š™¤š™Ŗ. š™ˆš™¤š™Øš™© š™¤š™› š™–š™”š™” š™©š™š™š š™«š™šš™§š™Øš™žš™¤š™£ š™—š™šš™›š™¤š™§š™š š™®š™¤š™Ŗ, š™—š™šš™›š™¤š™§š™š š™–š™”š™” š™©š™š™š š™„š™–š™žš™£. š™„ š™œš™Ŗš™šš™Øš™Ø š™„ š™£š™šš™šš™™ š™©š™¤ š™”š™šš™© š™®š™¤š™Ŗ š™œš™¤ š™›š™¤š™§ š™œš™¤š™¤š™™ š™—š™šš™˜š™–š™Ŗš™Øš™š š™žš™© š™¬š™žš™”š™” š™£š™šš™«š™šš™§ š™˜š™¤š™¢š™š š™—š™–š™˜š™ . š™„ š™£š™šš™šš™™ š™©š™¤ š™”š™šš™© š™œš™¤ š™›š™¤š™§ š™¢š™®š™Øš™šš™”š™›, š™›š™¤š™§ š™¢š™® š™›š™Ŗš™©š™Ŗš™§š™š š™–š™£š™™ š™©š™¤ š™”š™žš™«š™š š™¢š™® š™”š™žš™›š™š š™©š™¤ š™©š™š™š š™›š™Ŗš™”š™”š™šš™Øš™©.

š™‡š™Ŗš™£š™–-š˜½š™§š™žš™© š˜æš™š š™’š™šš™«š™šš™§

I always stay quiet, let my tears role down in silence.

When nobody looks, I let the mask fall down. I prison my feelings in my heart. 

I let the feelings come over me. They take control. Hopefully thinking they will lose it at a moment.

I hold it to myself, smile and shine trough the day. I stay quiet, trying not to make a mistake or say the wrong thing. Afraid of losing people all over again. Afraid that they will let me go like I never even existed.

So many things are holding me up. Being happy, is it really that hard?

My heart is filled with sadness, sadness you couldn't imagine. It's deep, it's cruel, it's hard but I hide it as long as I can.

 

love,

Luna-Brit